Water. I’ve always been amazed how God has used it over the years to teach me valuable life lessons. Whether it was working as a lifeguard and learning responsibility, swimming laps as an attempt to try and relieve stress, or experiencing a light bulb moment while washing my hair, water has always been transformative. Last evening was no exception.
Blame it on my broken dishwasher.
For days I’ve tried to ignore the fact that it’s broken, repeatedly pressing different buttons in hopes that I wouldn’t have to take out the dishes and wash them…again. Ugh. I’m one of those women who practically washes the dirty dishes BEFORE they even go into the dishwasher. After opening the door for the fifth or sixth time, I finally came to the conclusion the magic was simply not going to happen. If only I hadn’t been so stubborn in thinking that the dishwasher would somehow fix itself, I could have washed the dishes and been done two days ago. Instead, I continued to try and ignore my hidden mess that was waiting behind the silver door. With much frustration, I took out the glasses, plates, coffee cups and silverware and proceeded to immerse them in the sudsy sink water.
As I was drying the coffee mugs, I couldn’t help but think of how my dishwasher dilemma is symbolic of many women’s relationship with Jesus. Regardless if it’s a past we can’t shake, inappropriate habits or addictions we hide, or secrets we try to lock up forever, many feel they can never be clean enough to warrant a seat at God’s table. Women may avoid church, invitations to women’s groups or any event where they feel exposing their true self is at stake. It’s easier to keep a safe distance and avoid anyone who may possess a hidden key to our closet of skeletons.
Why do we women do this to ourselves? It's exhausting isn't it?
Rather than find a tribe where we can feel safely loved, we tell ourselves that someday we’ll get our act together, get clean and feel worthy. But sweet friend, we know that day will never come. We hijack our brain into thinking that God is standing in the Heavens, looking down on us with arms crossed, and shaking His head in disgust. It’s heart breaking that this is how so many characterize our Heavenly Father.
Rather than realizing He's already aware of the dirt in our lives and loves us nonetheless, we wear ourselves out physically and emotionally, trying to clean and sterilize our hearts.
Just like the dirty dishes I wash before placing them in the dishwasher, we women do a great deal of unnecessary scrubbing. Loaded down with dried on dirt or past and present sins, we refuse to allow God to pardon us and rather be shamed until our knuckles are raw and bloody. This weekend, get in a quiet warm place and read Romans a bit more closely. Allow His Word to shape your reality--not the other way around. Memorize Romans 5:8, “While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
He knew and knows about every speck of dirt in our lives and is still over the moon in love with you. Put down the scrub brush and give your hands and heart a rest. You are enough by simply being His.